In recent years I haven’t been a huge Halloween fan.

When I was younger I used to love it… Free candy. Need I say more? I didn’t think so.

But the lure of free candy has since worn off and left me rather uninterested in dressing up in any shape way or form. Most years, I forget Halloween’s coming or don’t really care that it’s coming, until somebody calls me at the last minute to invite me to a costume party.

“Oh crap… I don’t have anything to wear”, tends to be the first thought that dances through my head.

My advice is to stay true to this initial thought and bag the night right then and there before it gets worse.

Worse? What do you mean by worse?

This is what happens when you half-ass a Halloween costume and slap it together at the last minute…

Oh, Heavens to Betsy… Yes, I just went there… 2004… After that night, a self-imposed ban would prevent me from ever dressing up for Halloween again. However, I do suggest that everbody wear a skinsuit to a popular bar at least once in their lifetime.

But wait… it gets better. Yes, better. You see, I wasn’t alone. There were other idiots with me and there’s a good chance I wasn’t the biggest idiot of them all… Why don’t you scroll down a bit? Come on, start scrolling, it’s worth it…

Sorry fellas… but this one was just too good to leave buried in a file deep within my computer.

Well, I’m not that proud to say I was the “least biggest idiot of the idiots”, but in this case I really was. I at least had a beard, glasses, cowboy hat and boots to help conceal my identity because it gets even better…

After a couple 12 ounce cans of courage, we wore these outfits out to Maloney’s… Yes, Maloney’s. Right down on Tucson’s 4th Avenue at the old jam packed, meat market, coolest of the cool, frat guy and sorority girl hangout. Jeez… Poor old Derek didn’t even have a semi-sweet long sleeved skinsuit to wear. Corey and I could at least claim to be some sort of a retarded Captain America. But poor Derek… left all alone in his lycra… he was just a cyclist that night.

That’s just a damn shame if you ask me.

So everybody, please learn from Derek, Corey and I and practice safe Halloween skills tonight. If you don’t already have an acceptable costume, SCRAP THE NIGHT NOW TO AVOID THE POTENTIAL EMBARRASSMENT!

You never know, your buddy just might end up with some incriminating photos to post on his website…

Stranger things have happened.

Take care.

Categories: Daily Jibber Jabber.
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Well folks, it looks like things are starting to pull together…

With that said, I have a bit of news:

AKingsLife.com is very happy to announce a new advertising partnership with the RIDECLEAN cycling community. RIDECLEAN is a new and fresh approach designed to reinforce positive sporting ethics through a community of supportive athletes and enthusiasts of all types. Through this partnership, RIDECLEAN will have a positive and visible presence on AKingsLife and of course, my pledged support.

RIDECLEAN …… And the Rest Will Follow.

There you have it folks… Now what are you waiting for? It’s just to your right over there on the sidebar… Come on, stagger over, step inside, give it a browse our two, and see what you think. You never know… you just might like it.

Cheers.

Stay tuned to AKingsLife.com as later this week I announce more exciting news, features and advertising opportunities.

This things taking off folks… better get on board now.

AKingsLife.com …… Giving Freckled Kids Hope Since 1981.

Categories: Daily Jibber Jabber.
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Since most of my page views come during the work day from people at the office…

who most likely are bored,

and who most likely read this site when nobody is looking,

and who most likely are looking for ways to kill some time right about now,

I have a link for you.

Click here and send a Monk-e-Mail to someone you know…

Or don’t know for that matter.

Everybody thinks monkeys are funny, so go ahead, give it a try.

You can make the monkeys say anything you want. Yes, anything… I’ve already tried all the good one’s…

and yes, they’re good.

Enjoy.

Categories: Daily Jibber Jabber.
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Here’s what a recent news report on AOL.COM had to say about the truth behind my paycheck:

“How much is a bachelor’s degree worth? About $23,000 a year, the government said in a report released Thursday.

“There appear to be strong incentives to get a college degree, given the gaps that we observe,” said Lisa Barrow, senior economist at the Federal Reserve Bank of Chicago.”

I’m speechless… all these years… long, hard, rough years. I’ve been chasing the wrong thing…

I think I’m going to listen to Lisa because I’d like “strong incentives” too.

All this time I thought it was better results that would help me to sign a more lucrative contract…… Shows what you get for thinking. I suppose, on the bright side, I’ll be 12 credits closer to a higher cycling paycheck come early December when the semester ends. I’ve got a mind like a steel trap you know.

Take care, and kids… please, whatever you do… hoard those credits like they’re going out of style.

Good bye for now.

Categories: Daily Jibber Jabber.
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I was watching television a few nights ago and a commercial was on. In that time, a commercial for the upcoming 10 o’clock news appeared. Lin Sue Cooney (yes, I know all their names) rattled off what reports were coming up and at the end said, “A drunken transient steals a fire truck. Coming up at 10 o’clock.”

I thought to myself….

“drunken……

…transient……

…fire truck…..”

At that point it was rather imperative that I watch the 10 o’clock news. Lin Sue knew exactly what she was doing when those words were muttered in that particular order.

In the report, they said that in Prescott, Arizona a drunken transient stole a fire truck on Whiskey Row (the historic manstreet), got inside it and flipped on the lights and siren (strictly natural instinct for any male sitting in a fire truck for his first time). The drunken transient then did what his mother had probably warned him a million times not to do when growing up: he began to jump up and down on the seats of the fire truck as the town’s people just watched. Some in horror… some in amusement.

At that point I had about a million pictures running through my head. As most likely do you…

Man, it would have been one sight to see…

Alright, in the last few weeks we’ve strayed from the bike talk here at AKingsLife.com…and rightfully so. It’s the off-season for me and non-bike talk is rather desirable at the moment. But, now that we’re quickly coming up on November, my training’s about to pick back up and I promise a post very soon as to my winter thoughts and plans as I get ready to step back into the office. Look for it soon… as well as the debut of The Soul Ride.

Take care…

and do as your mother says and don’t jump on the seats.

Categories: Daily Jibber Jabber.
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Well folks, it’s going down…

A t-shirt order that is.

When I first posted pictures of my t-shirts a few weeks back I didn’t really anticipate getting all that much interest from you people. And then you proved me wrong…… for the first time ever in my almost 26 years of existence. Yeah, serious… first time ever. I know, it’s crazy… but oh so true. Ok, anyways, now I’m planning on placing an initial t-shirt order by the end of this week. For the first go around, I’m only going to be ordering the basic text t-shirts and not the one with the image on it. See the shirts here.

You can choose between sizes and a few different colors of an American Apparel t-shirt. See the t-shirt’s specs here. The cost will be in the ballpark of 20 USD and somewhere around 43,000 Lira for my Italian reader’s wishing to pay with their pre-Euro currency.

If this sounds like it’s right up your alley, and you find yourself interested in owning one of the finest articles of clothing since the M.C. Hammer pants and Hypercolor t-shirts of the 1980’s, please contact me by e-mail (austin@thebeanteam.com) or by leaving a comment below with your name and e-mail address. I moderate the comments, so they won’t appear.

I’d like to thank everybody for coming out and keeping this scene alive. I never really anticipated this much interest in the mindless incoherent babble I type here at this silly excuse of a blog. When I first started sharing my thoughts here last March, I wasn’t really sure if I had more than 3 reader’s… (special thanks to Mom, Dad and My Lady) and then somebody left me my first comment (it was my sister)… and then a second one (that was my brother)… But by the 7th or 8th comment my family was through with their obligations and I began to notice I had real readers such as yourself. After a few months I got my site set up with a traffic analyzing program and I began to watch the number of reader’s grow like a wildfire. Yes, that’s right, you don’t need to be ashamed anymore… there’s more readers out there just like yourself.

In the coming months I have a few new features that I’ll be adding to AKingsLife.com. One of which is The Soul Ride of a Thousand Undisputed Truths…

“Becasue Freedom Fighters Make Better Lovers”… coming very soon.

This new entertaining page will feature two loyal readers of mine that recently won a vote for a page here at my site. On this page, they’ll wax philosophically about bikes, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness as they walk down the long winding trail of life.

And… if they don’t wax quite philosophical enough… that same poll that voted them in, will be the same one that votes them out.

Stay tuned… and don’t forget to get your t-shirts while they’re hot.

Categories: Daily Jibber Jabber.
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